No one ever looks better than they did the first time that you fell in love. The only time that can rival that is the wedding day. But, ten or twenty years from now, can you still say, I love you?
Before you cringe, the title is just an example of what someone might say to a lover or a spouse after many years together. We are not specifically targeting weight in this post.
The point is that we have stars in our eyes when we meet the person who we choose as our mate. It’s not just because of physical appearance although that is what we see first. Personality, beliefs and actions all play a part in helping to solidify that feeling at the beginning.
But, how many of us know that true love is more than a feeling? Time and chance happen to us all and as time passes, life will happen. We will get older. Bodies will change but so will attitudes and situations in our lives. Tragedy is not an uncommon companion for many of us as we travel along in this world. Anywhere along the line, we can be changed forever.
The question is: Can your love stand the changes that will come? That will all depend on the basis of your relationship. It was once said that John Derek (film director) met and married his famous pinup wife Bo because he thought she was beautiful. But he was also known to have said that when her looks went, he would go too. He stated his truth, but we all know that looks are not enough to sustain a relationship for life. No one can stop the aging process forever.
Ingredients of an Enduring Love Relationship
Think of it as making a successful fruitcake. We know that they last for years on end so you’ll want your love to be as endurable as one of those but filled with fresh and good things so it is still appealing.
- Respect – You are individuals who have decided to live as one. But, that doesn’t negate who you are separately. Value each other’s opinions above other people outside the relationship.
- Laughter – Laughter is medicine. When we laugh, endorphins are released in the brain. These chemicals promote a feeling of positive well-being better than any supplement or drug. If you can still find something to laugh about together, you are on the right road.
- Acceptance – This doesn’t mean tolerating bad behavior, but acknowledging and being realistic about the changes that can happen over time – physically, mentally and spiritually. We are not the same as we were five years ago. We evolve as experiences change.
- Intimacy – Yes, intimacy is important. If you can still desire each other and connect on that deeper level, you can weather many storms in life.
- Inner light – Have you ever looked at someone and not seen the outside but the inside of them? You have learned to see who they really are. This is the hope that we cling to when our mate gets sick or endures a tragedy that threatens to change or break their spirit.
Life and love promises us one thing: There won’t be a dull moment. Can your love stand the tests of time?
“Love is blind – marriage is the eye-opener.”
- Pauline Thomason
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